Eat Your Heart Out, Calvin Klein

In an email exchange between my mom and some of her sisters regarding dress fasions this holiday season:

Mom: Yes, and so the notable fashionista, Liz Talbot, hit this holiday party early this season defining a new fashion trend so cutting edge that its longevity will remain to be seen. As she dashed from party to party, heads turned to check out her new statement: an almost thumb-flipping bow to fashion over form, as she comfortably strode in what could only be described as hospital green; a definite far eastern touch for ease and practicality seen in the cropped pant and easy tie string at the waist; the theme continuing on top with short sleeved, v-neck in simple cotton, inmatching hue, and even reversible. A one size fits all, gender-free statement that flies in the face of all things fashion, Liz will continue to defy all things trendy this season as she turns down all invites to all The season's most sought-after galas, and will only be receiving in her personalsalon. One to not only shun trend but to actually create it in doing so, Liz Talbot's next statement will include a total departure from body piercings and henna-hued body art, launching what is sure to become the next bankable trend: body scarring. Stay tuned!

My Aunt Coco: Liz, the Queen of Accessories, You forgot to mention accessories! This new fashion trend of yours may also include a new sac-de-pee, in gold so refined it appears to be liquid, No?

Mom: Mais wee wee!! Ma cherie!